Juggalo Jubilee

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Juggalo Jubilee

Today, Awful Dating Profiles is pleased to present you with America's most eligible juggalos.  For the uninitiated, a juggalo is a diehard fan of the lame (and hitless) 90s hip-hop/hardcore band, Insane Clown Posse.  So if you're looking for grown men with menial low-paying jobs who like to wear facepaint, look no further!



User: juggalo-jester24
Site: Plentyoffish
Location: Washington
Headline: looking for a caring loving woman

Juggalo-jester24 lists his occupation as "flirting", so we assume that he's an eccentric self-made millionaire who doesn't need to work.  Although he left the majority of his profile blank (juggalos aren't very big on typing, spelling, bathing, or finishing high school) he did take the time to list his interests: "go out n have fun"

(view his profile here)



User: juggalo_joey
Site: Plentyoffish
Location: Indiana
Headline: "here i am"

Joey is a 30-year-old who delivery boy who enjoys partying, video games, and professional wrestling.  He states that he loves Hondas and Nascar.  Best of all, he is 420-friendly!

In his own words:

juggalo love sports detroit lions and colts pacers and spurs, not much on baseball and love nascar. lol i love honda cars then chevy.. i got a soon to be 13but still like to party! love my kid so should you. dont run if u got kids im down with that too. and i really dont have alot to say about myself guess ull just have to talk to me

(view his profile here



No, you're not seeing things.  This nigga is white

User: juggalo nigga
Site: Plentyoffish
Location: Colorado
Headline: "Partyin Isnt Wat I Do Its My Lifestyle"

This 24-year-old waste of humanity from Colorado Springs is definitely going places in life.  Rehab, for instance.

In his own words:

hmmmmmm, so much to say in such a short space, well to start it off if u were able to look up the term "gettin fukd up" ud see my picture, i love partyin, and im fun to party with, drinkin, drugs, girls, smokes, and music, wit out these things im nothing, im not ur typical white boy, looks can be decieving, ima stoner, ima tweaker, im a roller/raver, ima sweatheart, and ima****ead, the people and events around me effect wat i do at that time, i hate drama, and **** azz niggaz, ima people person, hit me up if u like wat u see holla at ya boy

(view his profile here)    



User: juggalo_666
Site: Plentyoffish
Location: Illinois
Headline: "I am looking for a relationship!"

Brandon is a 31-year-old juggalo who lists his goal in life as getting his own place.  He lists his interests as playing video games, racing, and fishing.  He is also a father, although he doesn't have visitation rights to his son.  For some odd and inexplicable reason, a judge decided that this juggalo was an unfit parent.  Go figure.

In his own words:

My name is Brandon, i work at a temp service. I like to play PS3 video games. I go fishin in the summer time,i go to the races in granite every friday, I do have one son but i dont get to see him. I do have goals set. on of them is to get my own place...My type of music is ICP-insaine clown posse. I have a ford mustang GT...its not the greatest but im wanting to get it fixed. I would like to have a decent relationship with a honest COMMITED my ex wife was always cheating on me when i ran out of money, 

(view his profile here)


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