Title : Psycho of the Day
link : Psycho of the Day
Psycho of the Day
Meet metalfabricator, a 23 year-old self-described entrepreneur from Missouri whose online dating profile is harder to understand than a lecture on the Higgs boson particle given by a physicist with a stuttering problem.
For instance, this young chap begins his profile by discussing his love for metal-working, hiking, and traveling. Nothing wrong with that. But as he continues to describe himself, his inner psychotic comes out of the closet like a newly-empowered lesbian before a Gay Pride parade. In the third paragraph, he pleads "don't live your life for me" (as though hundreds of single ladies had been contemplating it), and from that point on, things go downhill faster than a fat kid on a rocket-powered toboggan.
By the fourth paragraph, metalfabricator begins to sound as if he had just been insulted:
"Do not doubt my loyalty, my honesty or my passionate nature. That's an insult. Do not make an ultimate conclusion from this profile. You can only see a tenth of an iceberg. Don't compare me to the jack***es you know. Stereotyping me is like putting a label on you."
Whoah! Simmer down, little fella. Who peed in your Cheerios? But wait, there's more! By the end of this douchewaffle's profile, his self-description morphs into an expletive-laced tirade against women who have obviously rejected his advances:
"If I'm not your type, get the **** real. That bullsh*t answer is a waste of breath. You don't even know what type I am. You just looked at some damn pics of me and said no. "I don't judge people." you say. I call bs. I suck at pics. What guy seriously take pics of himself? A chauvinistic ****head. Sorry about that tree sap that drained life and hope from you. Get over him."
Congratulations, metalfabricator. You may have struck out with the ladies, but here at Awful Dating Profiles, we are proud to dub thee King of the Psychos!
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| The tie-dyed coyote t-shirt- a white trash classic! |
User: metalfabricator
Site: Plentyoffish
Location: Kansas City, MO
Headline: "Dying Breed"
In his own words:
I know what I want in life. I am doing what I love in life. I'm not chasing dreams, I'm capturing them. I love creating with metal. It's my paper as an artist. I enjoy envisioning and making it come to life. I love building bicycles, cars, small crafts, aggressive designs and just cool sh*t.
I enjoy the outdoors, a lot. I love bicycling, hiking and camping and I'm down for an adventure. I love to road trip or travel. Driving in general is a freedom. It frees my mind and spirit. Seeing new scenery is renewing and uplifting. I love going to concerts to see my favorite bands. I love metal music the most but occasionally listen to country or pop depending on my mood.
Share your life WITH me, don't live your life FOR me. You have to be passionate about something in your life. Something that you care so much for, you wouldn't give it up for any reason.If you don't have a passion in life, don't bother talking to me please.
I seldom drink and don't smoke and prefer the same. I don't have kids but want a family one day.
Do not doubt my loyalty, my honesty or my passionate nature. That's an insult. Do not make an ultimate conclusion from this profile. You can only see a tenth of an iceberg. Don't compare me to the jackasses you know. Stereotyping me is like putting a label on you. I'm not a Libra. Born on the cusp so I'm a Scorpio.
Dying breed. A favorite song of mine. Heavy, brutal, **** your face up in the mosh pit music. If I'm not your type, get the **** real. That bullsh*t answer is a waste of breath. You don't even know what type I am. You just looked at some damn pics of me and said no. "I don't judge people." you say. I call bs. I suck at pics. What guy seriously take pics of himself? A chauvinistic ****head. Sorry about that tree sap that drained life and hope from you. Get over him.
(view his profile here)
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